Parenting Mistakes: Forgiveness for What I Didn’t Mean to Do to You

If anyone sins unintentionally in any of the Lord’s commandments about things not to be done, and does any one of them…he shall be forgiven. Leviticus 4:2, 31

Dear Child,

You looked so handsome today as your face peered at me over the many miles that separate us. You are a man now, boy of mine.

I love the familiar way your brows knit together like a wooly worm and your eyes look to the right as you think hard on the big life decisions you are facing. I have seen that look many times before. Like the time you took the vacuum cleaner completely apart and described to me your plans to turn it into a jet-car. Or the spring you made the decision to leave home two years early to attend a special school where smart kids gather to solve the world’s science and math problems. 

When you get that look on your face, you make things happen. I believe in you. You are about to do it again, on a much bigger scale.

I can’t help but think over the years I was given, priceless years with you. Years where I got to be your number-one helper. I was the one you came to for comfort and instruction, protection and guidance. I’m a writer, yet I can’t find words to adequately describe how grateful I am for this gift.

But I see so many mistakes I made. I tried to do everything right, you see, and in trying so hard, I failed. It was an impossible and naive goal for a first-time mother; I know.

I fear that the struggles you face now are a product of my errors. It paralyzes my heart sometimes at 2 am. I lay awake staring out the window as the curtain moves in the night wind. Wishing I’d done things differently. Been less stressed. Spoken more gently. Let some things go, and held on to others more firmly.

I’m so sorry. I also thought if I did everything right, I could protect you from hurt and trauma. Make everything turn out Right.

I realize now that I mixed my role up with Jesus’s role. I am not your savior.

Please forgive me for acting as if I was.

There is only one Savior, one mediator between God and man, the man Jesus Christ. (You memorized that verse when you were about 7. Do you remember?)

Parents can be teaching their children to memorize Truth yet themselves struggle to completely live it. This is because we are all still growing, no matter how old we are.

In the old Levitical law, long before Jesus’s life and death on earth, there was a sacrifice for unintentional sins. Errors. Mistakes. Things people did wrong without realizing they were wrong. When they eventually realized their guilt or the mistakes were made known to them, they brought a sacrifice to the priest. The sacrifice restored the giver’s relationship with God. All was right again; the giver walked away clean, with a fresh start. Fellowship with God was restored.

We do not live under Levitical law any longer. We who follow Jesus are sealed with His blood. He is our sacrifice, and through Him, our relationship with God has been permanently restored. And today, as I think on this, I am so thankful that even my mistakes have been forgiven.

Sadly, we all do things wrong sometimes without meaning to.

But you and I, child and parent, share an important thing in common. We have a Savior, who is Jesus Christ the Lord. And He gives both child and parent all they need for life.

So when you make accidental mistakes along the way, remember Jesus covered that.

Today, I need forgiveness. You need wisdom for decision-making. I am confident that He will provide all we both need.

I love you.

Mom

Good news for parents and children alike: God forgives us for unintentional sins. Mistakes we make even when we are trying our best. Share on X

Lord, please make me aware of anything for which I need to ask my child’s forgiveness. Thank You, Jesus, for Your sacrifice that covered all my mistakes. Amen.

@audreycfrank

Image by Lorraine Cormier from Pixabay