Tagged: shame

@audreycfrank Jesus was getting ready to leave in the boat. The man who was freed from the demons begged to go with him. But Jesus would not allow the man to go. Jesus said, “Go home to your family and friends. Tell them how much the Lord has done for you and how he has had mercy on you.” So the man left and told the people in the Ten Towns about the great things Jesus had done for him. All the people were amazed. Mark 5:18-20, ICB When Jesus asked him his name, the man of the Gerasenes answered with the name shame had given him: “My name is Legion, because I have many spirits in me” (v.9). The evil forces that had stripped his… Read More

@audreycfrank I was minding my own business when God’s Word took me by surprise, threw its handcuffs on me and placed me under arrest. As part of my research for a new book, I was studying Psalm 51 because it is one of the many Biblical passages about being clean and pure. I am fascinated by the offer of a holy, pure God to make His followers clean. Dirtiness comes from many sources. Sin is the most obvious, and the most nebulous category, sort of allowing us to toss our little selfishnesses into it like an ambiguous garbage can without taking a close look. However, as I dug into the Hebrew of verse 10, I could not avoid the piercing examination of my own heart… Read More

@audreycfrank In the very place where they were once named Nobody, they will be named God’s Somebody (Hosea 1:10, The Message). I once knew a girl who was ashamed of her name.  It was an unusual name, an uncommon name, a name which caused others to ask its origin. When the unavoidable question came, the girl would avert her eyes and mumble a soft explanation that left the questioner confused but with the distinctly uncomfortable impression that this topic was complicated. Her name had been given in haste, created by two people who found themselves in more trouble than they anticipated with a baby they had not planned. In the middle of a dark and chilly night, they escaped together to another place where no one… Read More

@audreycfrank Part One: When You are the One Suffering from PTSD "Don't trigger me!" one teen said to another as they dissolved into laughter. The phrase has become casual and funny in popular culture, but underneath the laughter there is a kernel of truth. For those who suffer from post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), a trigger can come unexpectedly, throwing them into a tailspin of fear and anxiety. [tweet_box design="default" float="none"]Recognizing the signs of #PTSD and knowing how to respond can make all the difference.[/tweet_box] One of the most indelible memories of PTSD for me happened one clear morning in Africa when a trigger interupted my life, warping reality. The old green Scout was my rescue car that day, the only reliable source of transportation available… Read More

@audreycfrank She just had a feeling. It was that mother-gut, knowing feeling that words just can’t quite explain. Such a feeling is weighed and measured in units of anxiety and apprehension, intangible but real. Something was wrong, and her son was trying to hide it. Climbing the stairs, she said a quick prayer. Lord, please reveal whatever I need to know. As she opened the door to her son’s room, he quickly slid something under the covers, eyes avoiding her gaze, lips mumbling a weak explanation. The carefully laid household rule that electronic devices were not allowed in bedrooms had been ignored. The temptation was too great. Seizing the phone concealed in her son’s blankets, the mother turned on the screen. Images she could never… Read More

@audreycfrank The billowing saffron colored melhfa blew around her small frame like a mystery. And that suited her, for that’s what she was the first day I laid eyes on her. An enigma, a puzzle, a silent beacon of courage pressing against the crowds outside our hospital gates. I did not understand her yet. But I would, and knowing her would teach me more than I could have imagined. Two hours later it was finally her turn with our team of examiners. The nurse was first, then me. As a speech-language pathologist on a cleft-palate team, my first job was to examine the patient and determine his or her candidacy for surgical repair within the context of feeding and speech. Patients’ names would then be… Read More

Dear Beautiful One, the Apple of God’s eye, Chosen not Rejected, Seen, Loved, Known and Treasured, the one called My Delight is in Her, [tweet_box design="default" float="none"]Your #story is part of God’s story in the history of the world.[/tweet_box] He is writing His story in you. What has just happened to you will be one of the most breathtaking parts of His great story of rescue in your life. But I know it does not feel like it right now. I imagine it feels dirty and scary. At that moment when the world changed for you, when a beautiful, normal summer day turned dark and full of fear, God gave you the strength to run. He filled you with breath to speak out against the injustice… Read More

I see you. I see your pursuit of worth. The way you try to walk without stumbling in those high heels. The nervous flutter of hands smoothing your dress, the careful way you styled your hair. I hear you comment self-consciously about whether or not your Chacos should really be worn with a floral dress. I see the lightweight scarf you chose for your hijab, hoping it might breathe just a little in the pressing heat as you sat under the relentless sun. I see the combat boots you chose thoughtfully and deliberately to make this important march today. I see your eyes darting around nervously while fighting to keep a steady gaze as you march proudly off the commencement stage. I see your colors,… Read More

@audreycfrank.com Trust in him at all times, you people; pour out your hearts to him, for God is our refuge. Psalm 62:8, NIV Since I was a child, I have had an inordinate desire to talk to someone. Growing up in abuse and trauma, one of the first lessons I learned was not to talk to anyone. [tweet_box design="default" float="none"]Silence is one of the punishments of shame, and one of the most difficult habits to overcome even after one has been set free.[/tweet_box] Don’t let people in; don't let them see what is real; don’t let them know about the darkness behind your four walls. So I began to write. I wrote to God, and to myself. Writing brought me nearer to God, and He… Read More

disarm: take a weapon or weapons away from (a person, force, or country); remove the fuse from (a bomb), making it safe; deprive of the power to injure or hurt. (New Oxford American Dictionary) I am heavily armed at all times. My weapons are both visible and concealed, and I am careful to wear them at all times. Over time I have collected quite an arsenal. Performance is my nuclear weapon, carefully engineered to obliterate rejection and disapproval across vast distances. Coming in a close second in power is a highly dependable weapon called Control. Its accuracy can be counted on and it rarely misses its mark, unless the target moves by forces beyond my control. The next weapon might surprise you. Called Good, it… Read More